Titanic after 15 years

I haven't stepped into cinema for a long time since I started working. But I swore to myself for thousand times that no matter how I will watch 3D Titanic. It's just a same old story which turns into 3D version in order to grab another bucket of gold in many people's opinion. However I still decided I must go for it, not to reminisce the golden days that I missed long ago, not to recall the very first puberty I had experienced. It's just a "re-education", to see what I've learnt in the past 15 years and how much I have changed in respect of the thoughts about the story.

It was a full-house Friday afternoon, I was in the 3rd row. Luckily it was a spacious hall and the seats located quite far from the screen, otherwise I may have to consult a neck specialist after 3 hours of raising my head. I was the minority who didn't watch with their other part, I totally don't mind as it does not really matter to me. There is no law stating you have to watch a romantic tragedy with your boyfriend anyway.

To be honest, the 3D effect didn't give me much surprise as many scenes actually makes no difference as a 2D version. All the so-called "unhealthy" parts were cut, there was literally nothing for you to see and you absolutely no need to worry someone would reach out his hands and try to touch something.However, that's not what I was looking for. I seldom re-watch a movie that is so famous yet so long. As I had vague memories upon many details, and some of them gave me a shock therefore I had a lot of unexpected feelings. Someone who I used to think he's bad ass now turns out to be a hero, someone died for a reason which I presumed wrongly for 15 years, some lines were so meaningful which I did not pay a slightest attention at that time, due to my very limited English vocabulary when I was only 11. Jack was as handsome as before, Rose was as chubby as in the past. But I do miss the feeling when I first saw Leonardo, his smile had lightened up my world,at that immature age.From Titanic to Inception, we saw a successful transition from a cute boy to a charming man. We've seen how years has carved its mark on his perfect face.I couldn't help sighing that how time flies and I've turned from an innocent girl knowing nothing about this world to today's me, sophisticated and simple, sensible and emotional, chatty and quiet, sunny and gloomy. Full of contradiction and complexity if you don't know me,a funny well-read and knowledgeable idiot if you know me a little, a pure plain piece of paper if you know me well.

Titanic gave me a chance to be touched again,it threw a pebble in my heart and I enjoy watching the ripples to diffuse. It gave me a strike to meditate and to care about something else rather than my tedious never-ending work. I know myself, I know I need to take a break from time to time, I need to breath otherwise I will suffocate in such cultural desert and I believe I'm not the cactus I used to be...

蓝色心情

从小就知道自己是个极度情绪化的人，前一秒还很高兴，后一秒遇到不开心的事可以直接一百八十度大转弯。没太多心机，喜怒哀乐都写在脸上，很少有装B死撑着的时候，也很少有机会遇到非要死撑的情形。

已经好久没有这么持续的blue了，我在办公室多少个小时，我就blue多少个小时，回到家，只要开着公司的电脑，我就继续blue。我向来知道我是典型的theory X，只是不知道严重到什么程度。虽然读书的时候我也不爱读书，可好歹都能咬咬牙坚持，倒也不见得痛苦到面目狰狞。（高中数学咱就别提了，那个是属于外星人的，咱地球人不在讨论之列）可是说到工作，part-time我做过不计其数，full-time的乱七八糟的工作也做过不少，虽然没有遇到会让我非常兴高采烈今天还没下班就期待明天上班的，可至少不会有这种持续的蓝色心情。

有朋友说，怎么我变了一个人？以前那个爱说爱笑的麻雀怎么像被人拔了毛似的？不光她怀念，我自己也怀念。是啊，我承认我是秃了，毛都贡献给资本家了，这年头，不光鸭毛鹅毛能卖钱，麻雀毛人家也照收不误。为了几个花生豆，贴上了时间，自由和快乐，很难说这样的取舍是否值得，但是为了生存，我们不得不做出一些违心的选择。我突然间非常痛恨所谓的flexibility，这意味着你走到哪儿，工作就跟到哪儿，你完全没有自己的空间，工作恨不得跟着你一起上厕所洗澡睡觉。我想要逃，跟自己的私人空间一起逃离到一个没人知道的地方，彻底的放空，卸下精神的枷锁，虽然只是暂时的也好。

小时候都以为自己能拯救世界，长大了才发现原来全世界都拯救不了自己。幸好，当太阳被乌云遮住的时候，还有你，为我点着一支蜡烛，微微的光虽然照不亮整个世界，但是足以温暖我心中那一片小小的未被侵蚀的地方。你让蓝色的心情不再蓝得那么单调沉闷，至少也要像坦桑蓝一样，散发着蓝中透紫的神秘色彩。我要很真诚地跟你说声谢谢，世上没有任何人是理所应当地为别人付出的，背后都有一个缘由，而我，当然知道这个缘由，一切尽在不言中吧...